Discover your kinky BDSM archetype across:
Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism
Be yourself and answer honestly to find out your Kinkiness.
Discover how your BDSM type impacts your sexual relationships.
Explore kinky archetypes and receive expert guidance on your BDSMality.
What is BDSM? BDSM is a broad term for consensual adult play and role-play. It has three parts: BD (Bondage & Discipline), DS (Dominance & Submission), and SM (Sadism & Masochism). The key word is consent. Partners talk first, agree limits and safewords, and give care after play. That is what makes BDSM different from abuse.
Safety basics: Agree boundaries and a safeword. Start light and slow. Do aftercare to help both partners return to a calm, connected state.
What it is: Pretending to be older or younger as part of play. Props and behaviour can match the chosen age, but it is role-play between consenting adults.
Why people like it: Can feel safe, comforting, playful or mischievous; offers clear guidance or caretaking.
Tips: Agree the age range, language, clothing/props, and off-limits topics. Keep real-life responsibilities separate from the role.
What it is: A playful, cheeky submissive who teases, resists lightly, or “breaks rules” to invite attention and correction.
Why people like it: Adds humour and challenge; the push-pull dynamic creates spark without true disobedience.
Tips: Define fun bratting vs. going too far. Agree fair, consensual consequences and repair steps.
What it is: A dominant who enjoys guiding and taming brats without taking offence—firm, calm, playful.
Why people like it: Enjoys the dance of challenge and control, using skill rather than anger.
Tips: Set clear rules and rewards. Keep tone warm but consistent so the brat feels held, not harshly punished.
What it is: A caring dominant who mixes authority with nurture—soft outside, strong inside.
Why people like it: Guidance, praise, and structure can feel deeply soothing and intimate.
Tips: Agree what “care” includes (check-ins, routines, tasks) and what it does not. Avoid real-life parenting dynamics unless both want that theme.
What it is: Someone who enjoys consensually using degrading words or tasks.
Why people like it: Taboo language or power imbalance can create strong arousal for some.
Tips: Pre-agree exact words and limits. Have a quick pause/reset phrase if emotions spike.
What it is: The decision-maker who leads scenes or relationships and accepts responsibility for safety and structure.
Why people like it: Control, service from a partner, and the mental focus of leading.
Tips: Lead with empathy, not ego. Check consent often and invite feedback after scenes.
What it is: Someone who enjoys being degraded within agreed limits.
Why people like it: Can create intense surrender, catharsis, or taboo arousal.
Tips: Use clear language lists: green (OK), yellow (careful), red (never). Plan gentle aftercare and reassurance.
What it is: A submissive with playful, childlike energy; often needs soft guidance and reassurance.
Why people like it: Comfort, structure, and a safe space to be vulnerable and silly.
Tips: Agree routines or tasks if desired. Keep finances, consent, and adult duties strictly adult.
What it is: Enjoys receiving specific types or levels of pain (e.g., spanking, impact; stingy vs. thuddy sensations).
Why people like it: Pain can release endorphins and deepen focus and surrender.
Tips: Build up slowly, use safe body areas, track marks/recovery. Keep ice, balm, and water ready.
What it is: A dominant with ongoing, often 24/7 authority over a consenting slave. High responsibility and trust.
Why people like it: Deep structure, service, and purpose; clear roles feel stabilising.
Tips: Use written agreements, review often, include exit rules, health breaks, and privacy boundaries.
What it is: Comfortable with more than one partner or relationship structure.
Why people like it: Variety, honesty, broader community, flexibility.
Tips: Share STI test routines, time management, and disclosure rules to protect all partners.
What it is: Takes responsibility for a consenting “pet” or “property”, sometimes 24/7. Can be sexual or not.
Why people like it: Clear roles, rituals, belonging, and daily structure.
Tips: Define daily care, communication rules, and privacy. Ensure gear is safe and hygienic.
What it is: Raw, instinct-driven “chaser” energy; less protocol, more natural movement and sound.
Why people like it: Feels animal, free, and present-moment.
Tips: Agree safe areas for roughhousing, nails/teeth rules, and a hand signal to pause instantly.
What it is: Acts as a pet (kitten, puppy, etc.) and may be owned; not always sexual.
Why people like it: Playfulness, comfort, simple roles with affection and routine.
Tips: Plan gear safety (collars, leashes), hydration, and a safeword that fits the role.
What it is: Raw, instinct-driven “runner” energy; enjoys being chased or caught.
Why people like it: Adrenaline, surrender, and intense focus on sensation.
Tips: Set boundaries for speed, force, and surfaces. Keep first aid and water nearby.
What it is: Enjoys tying and restraining partners with rope or hardware.
Why people like it: Art, control, connection, and the technical challenge of safe bondage.
Tips: Learn nerve safety, avoid joints, keep safety shears ready, and check circulation often.
What it is: Enjoys being tied and restrained.
Why people like it: Surrender, pressure, and rope aesthetics can be calming or erotic.
Tips: Report tingles or numbness quickly. Stretch before/after and hydrate.
What it is: Enjoys giving consensual pain and reading a partner’s responses.
Why people like it: Precision, intensity, and crafting a strong experience.
Tips: Learn anatomy, start light, escalate slowly, and watch breath, colour, and mood closely.
What it is: Gives ongoing control to a Master/Mistress, often 24/7 within agreed rules.
Why people like it: Deep purpose, clarity, and the relief of full service.
Tips: Use contracts, regular reviews, safewords, and planned breaks. Protect work, finances, and family life.
What it is: Likes to be led or to follow instructions; may be sexual only or part of daily life.
Why people like it: Surrender, focus, praise, and relief from decision fatigue.
Tips: Share limits clearly. Ask for check-ins and specific feedback so you feel safe and seen.
What it is: Sometimes dominant/top, sometimes submissive/bottom.
Why people like it: Flexibility, learning both sides, and meeting different partners’ needs.
Tips: Agree who leads in each scene and for how long. Avoid rapid switching if it causes confusion.
What it is: Prefers standard sex and mainstream relationship models.
Why people like it: Comfort, simplicity, and clarity—equally valid.
Tips: Communicate desires openly. You can borrow light BDSM elements (e.g., blindfolds) if curious.
What it is: Enjoys watching nudity or sexual activity.
Why people like it: Arousal from seeing real reactions and energy between others.
Tips: Only watch with consent. Discuss distance, talking rules, and whether touching yourself is allowed.
What it is: Enjoys being watched nude or during sexual activity.
Why people like it: Thrill, confidence, and being the centre of attention.
Tips: Keep it legal and private-venue only. Agree camera/phone rules and who may be present.
What it is: An open-minded person who wants to try many things before deciding what they like.
Why people like it: Curiosity and learning through experience builds self-knowledge fast.
Tips: Keep a shared “yes/maybe/no” list, try one new element per scene, and debrief to track what works.
Consent: Freely given, reversible, informed, specific, and enthusiastic—stop any time.
Communication: Use simple traffic-light words (green/yellow/red). Check in during and after.
Aftercare: Water, warmth, reassurance, snacks, rest, and a next-day message. Plan it before you play.